Friday, January 23, 2009 7:44 PM, CST
There's just something special about Friday's and the anticipation for the weekend. Just thought I would share a few praises with everyone! Praises that Nick and Tammy continue to heal well, despite a small set back for Nick. Praises we had beautiful weather yesterday and Ferlin and I were able to get out and walk 1 1/2 miles. Praises, I was able to make it to work every day this week and work the full shift. Praises for such wonderful people in my life: family, friends, church community and coworkers--I don't know if there is a more blessed person than I. (My humble thanks to everyone for loving and caring for us on this challenging road.) Decided since I don't have much to say, I am going to respond to the latest guestbook entries.
Kari, Thanks for your entry on the guest book, I was having a bit of a challenge keeping my spirits up the other nite (researching chemo side effects--not a good idea)...Josephine's comment was just what I needed!
Paul--I love you too bugs...and miss you so much!
Dan and family--We miss you guys too and appreciate the prayers! Thanks for the card Paula, loved the update on the kids.
Trudy--yup, I remember you, Vikings fans stick together!
Dean--thanks for taking the time to write, we loved helping grandma and think of her often. Please tell her that we miss her and look forward to seeing her soon.
Carol--thanks for taking the time to write. Everyones kind words in the guestbook really are an encouragement!
Jody--hope your having a fun weekend with my nephews at hockey! Let me know when there is a game in the area so we can try and catch it! Thanks!
Trusting in the Lord that we are all in His hands and He has a glorious plan for each and everyone of us!
ps. please continue to pray for Nick, Sandi and my mom. The road can get a bit long, especially when there is an unexpected dip. Thanks!
Monday, January 26, 2009 10:04 PM, CST
Hope this update finds everyone doing well! I am excited to share that my sweet hubby took me on a date yesterday to Luverne to see my very first hockey game. (Jody's son was playing). Great job Andrew, I had so much fun! Tonight I had another new experience, Kalina and I went to a yoga for cancer patients. It was very enjoyable and relaxing. They offer this program every 3 weeks, so the next time will be after I have my first chemo, hope I am well enough to attend. Yoga is new for me, as I was kind of hesitant about some of its practices, etc, I was surprised when our teacher incorporated prayer into your meditation. The breathing exercises should help when I start to get anxious about chemo. Some days it is still so hard to believe that we are on this road.
Thanks Brandy and Nic for the visit. We love you guys and hope we can connect again soon!
Pam, thanks for the card and picture of your beautiful family.
Sharon, thanks for the offer to bring grandma over for a visit. That would be very nice.
Allen, thanks for kind words and scripture referance. I don't believe I had ever read that Psalm...it humbles me to think that God collects our tears, something that most of us just wipe away...they are precious to Him.Amazing!..Thanks also for the reminder that God prevents us from slipping, some days it is hard to not feel that our lives are on a slippery slope. I also appreciated your words in the sermon yesterday: that we aren't here to operate as individuals, but need the community of each other. Although it is really humbling to be on the recieving end of such kindness, love, prayers, food, etc...this journey my family and I are on would be a real challenge without the community of family and friends. Thank you.
Evan, thanks for taking the time to write...your words are an encouragement.
Thank you all for your love and support!!
I have many thoughts going on that I wanted to share with you all, but I am too tired to make sense, so I guess you will have to wait until next time to hear my profound wisdome about life with cancer.
Thanks again for your prayers! Much appreciated!!
Thursday, January 29, 2009 9:24 PM, CST
Happy Thursday! Hope your week has been a good one so far. Ours has been busy, getting ready for chemo is almost like getting ready for a baby...I even have the "nesting" instinct going on...you should see my list, even if I was at full strength there is no way I would be able to get it done before the big day.
I picked up my wig on Monday, I think that must have made reality sink in as I was really "tender" on Tuesday and the tears flowed pretty easy. Lucky for me, I was able to have lunch with a really great group of girl friends. Tuesday night I went to a support group for young breast cancer survivors, what a wonderful group of woman. Their strength and courage was very uplifting. It was so sad to see so many of us there. This cancer crap really breaks my heart. I so pray for a cure!!!
Special thanks to Karla, Maria and all my friends at Sanford health~your card and gift was greatly appreciated! (I went out and got a scarf in preperation for my new "do").
Thank you Marti and Roger for your card and gift. Much appreciated.
Thanks Barb for your message. The Proverbs 31 woman is one of my favorite set of verses. I actually just printed the whole verse to give to my mom...watching her as she has walked beside her children is humbling and inspiring to me.
Someone told me that someday I will think of my breast cancer as a gift. I am not at that point, as I still think cancer is a great big interruption of my life and of my dreams. However, on my "tender" day this week, I wrote a poem called The Blessings and Cursings of Breast Cancer. As I was in a "I really hate breast cancer moment when I wrote it, I was very surprised at how it turned out...
Blessings....the time to share my love to my husband and children....a big reminder that every day is a gift from our Lord to be opened and shared with others....taking the time to spend with my parents and siblings...sharing the love of many friends...meeting a wonderful team of doctors and nurses....a chance to refine my character and evaluate my strength and weaknesses...a chance to look at my dreams and goals...frees me to tell others I love them when in the past it may have been difficult to say those words...a chance to reconnect with distant relatives and friends....a chance to forget the past and live for today...a chance to try new things...a chance to lean on others and let them love on me...a chance to call my mom everyday...a chance to say "I conquered the enemy" and I AM A SURVIVOR!!! The cursings: the reality of death , surgery and chemotherapy. Actually these could be considered blessings too...the reality of death does make you ponder your walk with the Lord, your family and everything in between. Surgery and chemo helps get rid of the bad guys, so that is a blessing. So although I still wouldn't have chosen this road, I am trying real hard to see the blessings. Knowing that concentrating on the blessings, along with the love of others and the strength of our Lord, we will be victors when this road is finished.
The reality of it all is that most days are really good and some days are just a bit "crappy"... I am so blessed to be able to share the good and "crappy" days with so many special people. Knowing the love and support of everyone makes going into chemo a bit easier, I know that I will be carried (physically, emotionally and by prayers) when I am unable to carry myself. I appreciate you all so much...thank you!
**please continue to pray for Nick, Sandi and my mom. Nick remains in hospital for IV antibiotics, praying he will be able to leave hospital soon!