This week a young boy from Sioux Falls passed away from cancer. This morning I read from the Team Tayden FB page, an even younger boy was admitted to hospice. A few months ago, one of the most beautiful woman I loved (Kerri Krump) passed away. And there are so many more lives touched (and taken) every day by cancer.
Six years ago today, as my family waited the cold sterile waiting room of Sanford hospital for 9 hours—I was in the surgery room having my breasts removed. The pain, the emotions, the fear…the questions all return for a visit on this Christmas Eve day.
I remember the morning of my surgery and the hospital chaplin saying to me…someday you will think cancer is a gift. I remember thinking (in not so nice of words)….well, you know what you can do with this gift! Unfortunately, cancer has a ‘no return’ policy. Six years later, I still don’t see cancer as a gift….but please let me share with you what cancer has shown me:
Cancer showed me fear.
—God showed up and held my hand through many friends and family.
Cancer showed me pain.
—God showed up and comforted me through medications.
Cancer showed me fatigue.
—God showed up and reminded me it is okay to rest.
Cancer showed me courage.
—God showed up through cards, words, and love of others.
Cancer showed me love.
—God showed up through others as they walked with us.
Cancer showed me…..that each one of has a purpose in this life….and a choice on how to live it. We can choose to love others. We can choose to forgive. We can choose to embrace every moment of this life.
Now, six years later, I am blessed with the perspective of time.
Yes, cancer robbed me parts of my body and my life. Yes, cancer claimed the lives of some very special people. Yes, cancer sucks!
Cancer, caused by a cell that got it’s wires crossed up…isn’t a choice—and it happens. Left untreated it most likely will kill. To receive treatment is a choice. Surgery, radiation, chemotherapy and many other options are available to help us fight back. Sometimes the treatment works, sometimes it gives a little more time. Cancer affects all.
Lately, my heart is heavy by another disease that is destroying lives and killing many people. It too starts as a small cell that got it’s wires crossed up…and it starts in the heart and left without treatment it grows to bitterness, anger, resentment, etc.
Thankfully the treatment for this disease, costs little—well, perhaps some of our pride, but this gift once given, will be one of your greatest gifts ever.
FORGIVENESS!
Cancer has forced me to slow down…and when a person slows down, they get to see things often missed in the busyness of life. I see so much pain and hurt caused by others to others. Some of it may be intentional, often though I believe it is more of a reaction to their own pain (hurt.) Often, it is a mere misunderstanding…and always it is a great waste of time.
Time…a precious gift!
This Christmas—My prayer and wish for you is to leave your check books and credit cards at home…and give someone who hurt you the gift of forgiveness.
9 comments:
The only real comment this needs is Amen - Let it be so. Everything else is superfluous - and may your day, and the morrow, and your New Year, be happy, joyous, and free of both illnesses.
Beautifully said, Kim. I am sorry about all you have gone through but thankful for the amazing person you are. Thank you for meeting others in their pain and giving them the strength to make it through.
What a beautiful and poignant reminder, Kim. Your life, words, and testimony are gifts to us all on this Christmas day (and every day.)
Thanking God that you are here 6 years later! You're a blessing to me and to so many others.
Merry Christmas!
Soo good Kim -- thank you for sharing your heart -- forgiveness is vital -- we can re-gift it -- b/c we receive Christ's forgiveness, we in turn, can forgive others -- it's probably one of the best gifts we can give to another. ;)
Bless you, friend. love, Hester
Kim,
Thank you for this post. As a person who has struggled with a long term disease, I truly believe that God can bring beauty to illness by using those slow times to allow us to focus on Him. Thank you for sharing your story and how He is working in your life.
God Bless and Be Encouraged,
Laci Ortiz
www.goodmedicineministries.org
I really like and appreciate your post.Thanks Again. Keep writing.
Time IS a precious gift! I think you're right about forgiveness, and if only that by itself could help with cancer. I've been looking up ways to deal with this horrible disease and the stories I've heard are so inspiring. This story is pretty inspiring too if you needed some uplifting news today > https://www.ez.insure/2019/09/breast-cancer-warning-signs/
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