Thursday, December 24, 2009

Yipee! One year cancer free!!



Merry Christmas and Happy South Dakota snow storm to you all! It is so hard to believe that exactly a year ago today, I was saying good bye to “my girls” and hello to life! This morning, I started to read my caring bridge from start of journey to present day…I wasn’t able to finish reading, the journey still seems too ???….

With the remembrance and celebration of Christ’s birth tomorrow, I can’t help but compare it to my surgery a year ago and the rebirth of me…I would like to share a few of the outstanding memories of surgery day…

When I was in the “foggy” portion of coming out of surgery, I remember hearing one of the nurses say, “don’t use her left arm for blood pressures.” As a nurse, I knew that the only reason they couldn’t use my left arm was the fact that the surgeon had to remove my lymph nodes. I had failed the test. My sentinel node biopsy was positive for cancer. (there is a special test they do for breast cancer patients…a dye is injected to light up the sentinel node, the surgeon removes this node, if there is cancer than they have to remove the rest of your nodes, if no cancer than they leave the your nodes: the thinking is that the sentinel node is like the “keeper of the gate”. Before surgery, I had signed a consent form that if the sentinel node showed cancer, the physician had permission to remove the rest of my lymph nodes.) I remember the instant tears and my first thought was “God, you could have prevented this and you didn’t!”…I was a bit surprised at my initial sadness and anger. After thinking about my response, a joy filled my heart. There have been times in my Christian walk; I wondered how deep my faith is? Do I really believe, or do I just think I believe? Well, my response, even while I was still “foggy”, was a great affirmation to myself that my faith and belief that God is truly GOD!! I knew (and still know) in my heart that God is in control. Yes, I was sad that I had a positive lymph node, but I also knew (and still know) that God is the great physician!

My children and husband continue to share about all the support and love that was given to them while I was in surgery…you were all vessels that God used to help a hurting and very scared family. Thank you for your caring and love, not only on the day of surgery, but throughout this journey.

Since it seems at Christmas there is much talk about presents, I thought I would share with you a few gifts that I have received through this journey:

The gift of knowing that God is ever present, He knows our needs and
always provides…

The gift of love, this has truly changed my whole my life…through
almost losing my life, I learned to not only love myself, I
learned how to receive and believe in the love from others.
My family and I have been so blessed by the love of so many.

The gift of life, need I say more…

The gift of family….

The gift of friendship….

The gift of meeting some really remarkable women who happen to be
on the same journey as I....

The gift of joy and laughter…

The gift of health…

The gift to dream…

May you also experience the gifts of God, love, life, family and friends, health and dreams this Christmas Season!

Thanks again for your prayers and love!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Beautiful reflection and what a great time to celebrate your cancerversary Kim. Continued blessings and good health to you - Marie x