Friday, May 6, 2011

Another scan...

Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine.
~Anthony J. D'Angelo, The College Blue Book

I have had such a blast these last few months…living life to the fullest! So, maybe that is why this past week has found me a bit frustrated…life after cancer feels like you are in a forever game of tug-a-war: Cancer vs Life. As I shared with my oncologists, cancer may have been part of my life, but it is not my life. Unfortunately, some symptoms have presented that warrant some medical testing. Doesn’t this ugly beast clearly know it is not welcomed?!?

So, this next Monday, I will be having another PET scan…just to make sure the ugly beast isn’t the cause of my pain and fatigue! The good thing is that I should have the results the same day.

I struggled with sharing this in bloggersland for a few reasons:

1. There are many women who are in a forever battle against this beast…so, really do I have any reason to complain about having to have a PET scan, when living with cancer is their life reality?

2. Sharing this makes me feel very vulnerable.

3. I hate that I bring concern and worry to my family and friends.

4. I don’t believe cancer has reoccurred, so it feels silly to share.

The reason I did share this in bloggersland:

1. It is human to find comfort knowing that someone else is struggling. There is a knowledge deficit concerning the physical, emotional and mental challenge of survivorship. Those of us who have chosen to blog about our journeys have a great privilege and responsibility to share all of our experiences (good or bad). I believe that sharing our journey can offer hope and encouragement to someone else. So, if you are struggling with the after effects of treatment, you are not alone…we understand…we care!

2. I believe in the power of prayer and I know that many of my blogger friends are awesome prayer warriors! My prayers are that I continue to keep my focus on God, trusting and believing in Him.

3. Plus, I just figured some of you would like to know, because friends share concerns.

Off to win this round!!


Mary Aalgaard said...

Yes. Your reasons for sharing and reaching out are valid and wonderful. We are not meant to live in isolation. And, wouldn't you want to know if someone you care about is struggling with something? Let's walk together.

Maryann said...

Concerning your #1 reason to share, I was one of those that looked for blogs of women who were willing to share their stories when I found out I had breast cancer. It helped me realize much of what I was dealing with was "normal" (and yes, there was also hope and encouragement to be found) Thanks for sharing, will keep you in prayer.

JeMA said...

Kim, I believe we are meant to connect with eachother, we were created to need the help of others on our journeys. Thank you for sharing so truthfully your very authentic journey. I am linking arm in arm with you and the others!

Vicky said...

Joining right along with you! Long ago, my first rule for blogging was to blog for me. I have ever since, and I never really stop to consider whether I should or shouldn't share anymore. Now I can say a prayer for you, because I simply have to believe, the "worry" never completely leaves you. But I hope the burden of carrying it daily can be lessened!

Anonymous said...

Love you girl. You are an amazing role model to me in my faith walk....You take my breath away with your courage and heart.

I love you and will be praying for you.


Marie said...

Thinking of you xxx